Anakin's Lightsaber
by Candace Marie
Summary: After defeating Luke on Bespin, Darth Vader collects his former lightsaber and reflects upon his life


Anakin's Lightsaber

Darth Vader held the lightsaber in his hand, looking down at it as memories played in his head. His son. His son. Padme' s son. The baby hadn't died with her. Which meant he hadn't killed her, but that his nightmare, once again, had come true. He turned the durasteel cylinder object over in his hand as he examined the once-lost lightsaber. Possessions were forbidden to a Jedi, even his lightsaber was more of an extension of himself, it had a lighter feel than the one he had wielded for over twenty years.

_My master always said, Anakin, this weapon is your life. He was wrong, you are my life. Here. Take it. It's yours._

_It's a lot heavier than I thought it would be._

_Say the world and I'll leave the order._

_You can't do that. The Republic needs you._

_And I need you, Padme_

He allowed himself to think of her, of what she had meant to him. He would protect their son, no matter what, no matter that he was a Rebel. Would he join him, or would he turn away from him again, as the Jedi had, as Obi-Wan had, as Padme had. Had they really betrayed him, or was that another of Sidious's lies?

_Come away with me, help me raise our child before it's too late._

_No, we don't have to run anymore, we don't have to hide. I can overthrow the Chancellor. I am more powerful than he is._

_No, you are a good man, don't do this._

No, he wasn't a good man. He was a monster, it was too late for him, but not for his son. He could save his son. He ignited the blue blade, taking in the once-familiar color. This was a lightsaber for a different person, it wasn't his anymore. Had Kenobi taken it so that his son would strike him down with a weapon he had once crafted with his own hands?

_How many times must I tell you, this weapon is your life._

_Yes, Master._

_Try not to lose it. I don't know what you would do without me constantly finding your lightsabers._

_Let's hope I never have to find out._

He shook his head, killing Kenobi hadn't given him the satisfaction he had sought for all those years. Yes, he was angry with him for taking his son from him but there was another feeling...one that felt like regret. A Sith does not feel regret. He listened to the mechanical breathing of the machine and called to mind the image of Padme, he really wished he knew what Luke looked like without the red tint of the mask. Was he hair dark, or blonde? His eyes blue or brown? He knew he had a softness to his features like his mother, though he did have something of Anakin in him as well.

"He is Anakin's son, Darth." He pulled out his Sith lightsaber.

"Show yourself, Kenobi."

"As you wish, Darth." He watched in fascination as a shimmery figure of old Kenobi appeared, slowly changing to the Obi-Wan he had first met, the padawan Qui-Gon had introduced him too.

"This isn't possible. I am going insane."

"You should know Anakin, that with the Force all things are possible." Darth Vader didn't say anything for a moment.

"That name has no meaning to me," he stated after a moment.

"Why so melancholy, Anakin?"

"Sith Lords don't feel sad. Everything I have done has been for justice and for peace."

"Even Padme's death?"

"Leave me be," Darth Vader roared.

"Tell me, Anakin, what do you live for now?"

"My son," he answered, unsure why he was talking to himself.

"He won't join you."

"Then he will die," Darth Vader replied.

"You will kill him."

"If he gets in my way. It won't come to that."

"I feel a change in the Force, old friend."

"We were never friends."

"I disagree."

"You would. You never cared for me. I was just an obligation to you."

"How long have you been telling yourself that?"

"You are nothing. You are less than nothing to me. Go."

"As you wish, Anakin. I will leave you to the silence of space." And he disappeared, and Darth Vader looked out at space from the control deck. Kenobi was right, space was lonely. But he didn't need friends. He didn't need anyone but his son...


End file.
